What it’s Like to Be an Escort

Are you wondering what it’s like to be an escort? Well, it really depends on how and why you decided to start in the first place. For me, a low self-esteem, larger-than-life kind of person, being an escort was an absolute revelation. I found escorting in my 40s as a means to finally be happy doing something I enjoyed, being paid well for it, and being my own boss. For years, I had tried so hard to be appreciated for who I was. Yes, I was overweight, but I was strong, I was pretty, and I thought I could be very sexy. Regardless of the fact that men didn’t seem to want more than to just have sex with me, I really had a lot of confidence in the bedroom. Is this why I scared them off in my real life? 

Becoming an Escort is Empowering

Whatever the reason, I was sick of giving away my great sexual energy only to be left with a hot, steamy, but very empty bed. So why not take on this vilified profession? A side of me thought “YES!! Finally I will get paid instead of just giving it away! I will get something out of this all, and stop feeling used.”

And guess what? This is EXACTLY what happened. 

How I Started Escorting

I started with a couple of out-call appointments which were both thrilling, and a bit scary, as detailed in my thought process below:

  • Would I be able to please these people, and would I be safe? I felt secure with the screening and safety call I had arranged. 
  • That initial knock on the hotel room door. Would he be reasonably normal, like I thought he would be? Would he like me? Was I pretty and sexy enough? 
  • Was I cut out to do this? I was delighted to find myself being praised and adored! This was more than I ever imagined! 

I set myself up in a cute little studio, and offered whatever I wanted. Girlfriend Experience, BDSM, crossdressing and other fetishes, Porn Star Experience, role play. It was time for fun! 

I bought a second phone and advertised myself in a few places. I was ready to knock anyone’s socks off.

You’ll Have All Sorts of Wonderful Clients As An Escort!

The men were wonderful! I mean they were well behaved, they were clean and neat, and their breath was fresh. They really tried hard to make me happy! They insisted on being what they thought was their sexiest. They were fun, they were passionate. They gave me gifts! They happily paid and came back again and again. 

And the best part, they really wanted to give me orgasms. And YES, THEY GAVE ME ORGASMS! I really did let myself go with many of my clients. Did I have to offer ‘encouraging vocal approval’ they may have mistaken as an orgasm? Yes, yes, yes, god YES! Hell Yes, I faked it more than a few times. But only when I felt it was important to that client, and it wasn’t happening for me. After all, being an escort is often about being a performer. 

Escorting is a Helping Profession

To be compassionate and loving was a very important part of my work. I saw myself as a helper, a lover, a friend… even as a healer. I tried to help these men find their souls again. I tried to help them feel like men again. To help them feel lovable, acceptable, and capable. The responsibility of deflowering a 30-year-old virgin was something I did not take lightly. Being with an 80-year-old man who just wanted one last orgasm was an incredibly huge honour, really. 

These people put their trust in me. The feeling this gave me was actually humbling. I did my very best, and think I did a pretty good job for the most part. 

And You’ll Have Some Clients That Will Keep You On Your Toes!

Yes, of course there were some clients who weren’t the most appealing. Yes, I had to dig deep into my compassion and forget about their looks or their awkward personalities. I always seemed to be able to find a way, especially when I looked at my own rolls of chub and cellulite.  I’m a professional. I know that I have to do my best to give them the experience they were paying for. 

There were ones who “forgot” to shower and had no idea how bad things could be. There were the 400-plus pound ones who were absolute sweethearts, who made me feel skinny! There was that much older, nearly toothless character who chain smoked and always started a date with a super corny joke. 

I never got bored, that’s for sure.


The ones you’d drool over if you saw them in a club. The ones with bad boy tattoos, muscles for days, and a cock that seemed made especially for you. The kind of man who didn’t need to say much. You just had to look in their eyes and feel like you were falling into a pit of lust. When they came back again, you were in freaking heaven. 

Getting paid by these sex-devils was like winning a lottery. 

There’s Many Types of Sexual Offerings In Escorting Work

he most delightful fun was had with the submissive crossdressers. I loved treating them like my lesbian lovers. We smoked and drank and enjoyed our stockings and garters. 

Getting into BDSM was also very much a big part of my offering. Nothing like tying someone down and blindfolding them, and then doing whatever I wanted. One does get devious when the opportunity arises. And the creativity inspired was like artwork for me for a long time. I really did have fun. Eventually though, I really had to dig deep to find new ways to excite my submissive. I was getting bored.  Near the end of my career I was tired of domination. It had become a chore and I lost my joy. It ended up feeling a lot like work. 

The Secrecy of Being an Escort

I loved the secrecy too. The fear and hiding. It was both stressful and also liberating. I was doing something subversive, off the radar of so many. I felt like I was getting away with something huge, as if I’d robbed a bank or something. Here I was, being a good normal BORING person, but actually I was so naughty, and bad, and having so much fun doing things I wasn’t supposed to be doing. The scandal! The thing is, this rebel in me had never felt so happy. Until I had to lie, over, and over, and over again. 

I could never ever reveal what I’d been doing. EVER. I took great effort to keep my secret life a secret. Supposedly, it still is with family and some friends. I hope I can take it to my grave. I would never want my parents burdened with this. I still have guilt over my choice in this career, even though it’s been years since I retired, but only because I fear the reactions of my family. Do I regret doing this actual work? NOT ONE TINY BIT. 

The regret I do have is that at the present time, our world is a place where sex work is vilified and considered shameful, instead of being considered empowering and beautiful. I gave love and compassion and fun to other human beings, and should not feel ashamed. And I don’t!

 In Summary – What it Was Like Being an Escort

Being an escort was an opening to discover what I was capable of. To discover what I really loved about people. To give me an opportunity to show people love. To find out just how creative I really could be. How confident and assured. How well I could handle a business. 

It also taught me I was a valuable human being, not just for the sex I could sell, but because I cared so much about people.