How Becoming a Dancer Changed My Life by Lola Foxx
When I first started dancing I was in an abusive relationship, slowly worn down over time into someone I could barely recognize.
I struggled with creating boundaries in my life and with people around me, simply because I was too scared to make them and I didn’t feel like I deserved to have any.
Fast forward to 6 years and I am in the healthiest, happiest relationship of my life.
Creating Boundaries
I no longer let people walk all over me and I am continually learning how to set firm and clear boundaries with the people in my life.
There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that this is because of dancing.
Being in an environment where I am in control of the situation and can firmly tell people my prices, my rules and my limits all while making money, and being surrounded by strong minded, independent dancers has been such a huge help for me and setting boundaries.
Becoming My Own Boss
Before I was a dancer I was working as a baker. That meant a lot of early mornings, usually working 6-7 days a week and definitely not being paid enough. Being someone who is a night owl, this schedule was extremely draining and I was not happy.
In a lot of clubs you are considered a contractor which means you are pretty much your own boss. You can imagine how ecstatic I was when I learned that I would only be working at night, about 4-5 hour shifts and I could come in any day I want or take as many days off as I want.
Having the freedom to pick my schedule meant I could plan my whole life out with so much ease, take breaks when I needed them, and also work as much as possible when I felt like it.
It’s given me a great sense of pride becoming my own boss, and having the time and money to travel and enjoy life has made me a much happier person.
Money
Before dancing, I was living paycheque to paycheque and struggling to make ends meet.
Dancing isn’t always glamorous, and I think it’s important for people to know that it’s not always champagne and $100 bills.
I don’t want to mislead anyone and say that I leave the club with $1,000 every night, because that’s just not the case.
Being a contractor means that you don’t receive a wage from the club, so if it’s slow and people don’t tip, you don’t make money. The good nights definitely outweigh the bad ones, but sometimes it can be very frustrating.
Having said all that, since I started dancing I’ve been able to travel more than I ever have before, I can buy myself things I want, when I want. I’ve been able to save money quicker than I ever have and I live by the “treat yo self” motto.
Leaving the club on a Saturday night with $1,200 in my wallet is a very empowering and addicting feeling.
The good nights absolutely outweigh the bad, and the good nights always come around eventually.
Patience in this industry is key.
Confidence
I will forever be grateful for the self growth that dancing has given me.
Before dancing I was never really a super confident person. With both my looks and just how I presented myself to the world.
It didn’t happen overnight, but slowly & surely I became more and more sure of myself as a woman.
Being surrounded by strong, beautiful independent humans in the club started to rub off on me. Dancing naked in a room full of consenting adults who are cheering me on and paying me is one of the best feelings I have ever experienced and it truly makes me feel so incredibly beautiful.
I began to use that new found confidence in my relationships and life decisions and I just started feeling so beautiful inside and out. Now, I am the most confident I have ever been and I know I have dancing to thank for that.
Sex Positivity
I’ve always been a fairly sexual person, but I wasn’t always comfortable sharing that. I feel like a lot of women are often shamed for expressing and embracing their sexuality.
Dancing helped me realize that harnessing that sexual energy is actually incredibly empowering.
Being able to provide a consensual, sexy experience for people in the club has been so rewarding. Having someone be truly grateful for your presence and energy is such a wonderful thing.
There is nothing wrong with embracing your sexual energy, as long as you’re doing it in a safe consensual way I think it’s super beneficial for people and I wish more people would.
Dancing has been the best decision I’ve ever made for myself. I have made life-long friends and I wouldn’t trade my experiences in this industry for the world.
I can’t wait to keep growing and learning in this crazy, wonderful industry.
Bio
My name is Lola Foxx and I’m a 28 year old dancer living on the west coast of Canada.
I’ve been a dancer for 6 years and I love it!
When I’m not dancing you can find me at home with my partner and our dog watching Netflix with plenty of snacks.
I love travelling, cooking and going to the beach.
Instagram: @love.lola.foxx
Linktree: https://linktr.ee/foxxy.lola